Brian Wallace Haymakers Intro from brian wallace on Vimeo. @gauntletfilms
Four, Five, Six, Seven, Eight… Are you OK to continue?
Shit…
It’s only the first round and I’ve already taken some pretty big shots from Greg, and now having gotten my feet tangled and dropping to a knee, I’m in a corner and the referee is giving me a standing 8 count. Safe to say things are not going according to plan…
One Week Earlier
The week before the event, Harry told me that he wouldn’t be able to be there in my corner with me. His pro fighter Jarrell ‘Big Baby’ Miller had secured a last minute match in Kansas and Harry had to be there with him. No way around it, I was pretty bummed. I’d been working with Harry now for almost 4 months and I was looking forward to closing out the experience with him. He’d asked another one of the trainers, Ro, if he’d work my corner for me and thankfully he said he would…
It was a curveball I hadn’t been expecting- though upon reflection I realized it was of course part of the journey. This was just another one of the trials I’d have to work through in order to complete this quest. In fact, it was the story actually coming full circle in that Ro ‘The Show’ Malabanan was the trainer I’d initially reached out to when I get accepted to participate in Haymakers. I’d met him a few months earlier at his previous gym and really liked his style. He then referred me to Harry, but was now back to see me over the finish line.
So I spent my last few days training with both Harry and Ro. They have much different styles and I found myself actually grateful for the way things shaped out. Ro’s training (and mental coaching) was like a finishing touch on what Harry had built- and though this wasn’t the ending I had in mind- I trusted that this was the way things were meant to be.
Mom Arrives!
Mom flew in on Monday (my fight was Thursday night) to spend some time in NYC, visit with some friends, and catch up with family etc. It was nice having her in town as she is the inspiration for the 4 months I’ve trained for this boxing match. Tuesday, after my last real/hard training session, she finally got to meet Harry (after hearing so much about him) and see the gym I’ve been training in. It was a cool experience for me, having Mom at Mendez, almost like it completed something intangible in the overall experience.
Wednesday morning I met up with Harry one last time. We wouldn’t be training, but I wanted to hang with him before he left so we watched some of the video from my sparring sessions. He gave me some last minute pointers, then said I was ready. I was still sad he wouldn’t be there, but again was trusting in the process. After a few work meetings in the city, I headed back home to Brooklyn. Mom was eventually coming over with her friends to see my ‘new’ apartment and have a snack that evening. It was a nice distraction having their company for a little bit, but I ultimately had to say good night so I could really begin to prepare… Ro had given me some pointers, things to think about, visualize etc. Basically I was meant to relax, eat a good meal, chill out, and get good sleep.
After some food, I walked up to my gym to hit the steam room for a bit- figured this was a good place to clear my head… plus I was still a little sore from the last workout. I knew it would help with my focus, what I didn’t know was that while in there I’d have the final epiphany that would change everything for me…
The Man in the Arena
I posted briefly about this the morning of the fight- but this is the full story, the bolt of lightning that struck me the night before my fight and changed my entire attitude and outlook on everything.
One of the things Ro suggested to do was to write down the things I felt I was good at (slipping jabs, strong right hand, cardio, etc) and read and reread them- focusing on the positive. When I sat down in that steam room however, my brain pivoted slightly, it just knew what I needed to finally realize before stepping in that ring. And that was that Haymakers (and this whole experience) was actually the finale of my travels, of my ‘Excellent Adventure’ that I’d started way back when I quit my job in September of 2016. Sure, I’d technically finished visiting other countries in February and have had a job since May- but what I didn’t realize is that the meter on my Hero’s Journey was still running- and THIS was actually the final chapter.
As I sat in that steam room, my brain started taking me to all the places I’d visited, the experiences I’d had, the people I’d met, the lessons I’d learned… Bali, Peru, Nepal, India, Africa, etc; Yoga retreats, Mountain climbing, Ayahuasca, Fitness and Nutrition camps; all the conversations I’d had with spiritual leaders, therapists, coaches, friends etc- ALL of it, was in preparation for this moment. To finally face my biggest fear- the fear of judgment.
Many aspects of this have plagued me my entire life. Constantly comparing myself to others, always worrying what people thought about me- and defining my own self worth by these (most always incorrect) perceptions. Never wanting to assume leadership positions (or any responsibility for that manner) for fear of failure and embarrassing myself. Never wanting to let friends or family down, not wanting to disappoint/always trying to please. Never wanting to be outside my comfort zone… ALL of this tying back to this notion of judgement – that people wouldn’t think I was good enough, cool enough, talented enough etc etc.
And you know what? Fuck that. The next night I was going to step into a boxing ring, in front of 1800 people, including over 50 of my closest family and friends. Just me. Not part of group or a team. The entire focus would be on me- doing something I was definitely not ‘good’ at- with nowhere to run, nowhere to hide. Completely risking a massive failure with everyone watching! Just getting in that ring was what this whole thing was about…
I sat in that steam room with all this hitting me at once, and in that moment I knew I was ready. Win or Lose, I was going to do this, fear of judgement be damned. This was the true end of my Hero’s Journey- I would finally be The Man in the Arena.
Phew…
With that realization, I walked back home to start to wind down. I took a nice hot shower while listening to some of the music that had accompanied me on my travels. Now that I had put this all together I was feeling pretty calm, and just wanted to dwell in this mindset for a bit, before heading to bed… but not until one last tradition.
My random superstition has always been watching Varsity Blues the nights before football games or volleyball tournaments (and sleeping cuddled up to the respective ball)- tonight would be no exception. I watched Johnny Moxon be his heroic self and ultimately fell asleep hugging my boxing gloves. 🙂
Tonight’s the Night!
I was wide awake with the sunrise- there was no chance of sleeping in (despite how badly I wanted to!). As I was the 13th match on the card, I knew my fight probably wouldn’t happen until 1030pm at the earliest- which is generally after I’d gone to sleep these past few months, so was trying to shift my sleep schedule forward a few hours so that I didn’t crash walking up to the ring. But that was wishful thinking. I checked my weight- 172- so was good there. I went through my morning ritual of stretching, warming up, making my protein shake, taking my probiotics and vitamins etc. I could do all this in my sleep now, it was just as natural as breathing these days.
Alas- I DID actually have 2 meetings that morning! Even though I wanted to just chill and mentally prepare, when working for a startup and potential clients want to chat you can’t really say no. (Hi Jeff/Mike if you’re reading!) But, looking back it was a welcome distraction for the morning AND the clients did wish me good luck- of which I needed all I could get!
Back home around lunch to really start getting into it. I had a little fruit and a protein bar- Ro and Harry recommended I eat light and bring food to the weigh in. Once I had officially made weight I could eat a bit more, some protein, some carbs for energy etc… Lots of science went into the last day! Ro recommended I try to nap- but though I did lay down for a bit, there was no chance of sleep. I ended up journaling a bit, getting my bag ready for the night, and then watching Star Wars- the OG Hero’s Journey! Mentally I was dodging and blocking punches, thinking through my counters… with the hope being that when I blacked out in the ring later on, something would just be in there (another theme I’ll come back to).
And while it was A New Hope inside, The Empire Strikes Back had just come on outside! A massive snowstorm was descending on NYC… figures. All part of the journey, right? Could barely even see my balcony from inside, the snow was coming down so hard! And it was now time to get moving… to make my way toward that arena. I grabbed my bag and bundled up- it was gonna be a chilly commute to midtown. As I made my way toward the subway station, snow coming down on me, it all just felt right. This was a fucking quest and there would still be last minute challenges to overcome. I was still listening to the Walter Mitty playlist, it just had me in the right mood- not too excited, not too mellow… just an ‘adventurous calm’ would be how I’d describe it. I was on my way to the final battle, the climax of my personal movie. Thoughts of Luke fighting Vader in the cave on Dagobah (only to face his biggest fear, facing himself) were front and center… but I wasn’t nervous, I was ready.
Checking In
As I got to Hammerstein Ballroom, I was amazed at the setup! It looked like a proper arena complete with VIP tables, bars, cool lighting and sound, and of course- a lit up boxing ring right there in the center.
Downstairs I found all my fellow boxers. Everyone had to be there by 445 for weigh in, which would then be followed by some photos, a few announcements, and then a final checkup from a doctor. After that it was the waiting game. The doors opened at 630 with the event set to start at 730 (though this was pushed back like 30 min due to the snow!). We had all been chatting during the preliminary stuff, but slowly everyone got into their own pre-fight rituals. Some chilled and zoned out to music, some ate food they had brought, some chatted strategy with their coaches, some stretched and shadow boxed… I knew my fight wasn’t going to be for a long time so I didn’t want to get ready and warmed up too early- so after crushing my pre fight meal (brown rice, salmon, and broccoli) I decided to journal for a bit more. I wrote down all those aspects of my travel I had thought about the night before- every single one of those moments that in some way had prepared me for tonight. As the list grew, so did my inner calm as well as my confidence. I flipped back through my journal and re-read entries, I hopped on my iPad and looked at travel photos on my blog. I had no doubt that my epiphany from the previous night was 100% the truth. Every day of the past 2+ years was all preamble to tonight.
So I waited… and waited. I watched my fellow fighters head up for their matches, then come back down. While waiting though I did get a text from one of my best friends, John, saying he was downstairs and nearby if I wanted to say hi. Perfect timing. I needed to see a friend, and I needed to hear what he said to me. It was such an incredible gift, the compliment he gave me. In short, he said in his entire athletic career (every sport in HS, College Football, etc), out of all the people he’s played with/against, teammates he’s had, athletes he’s watched- there have only been 2 people that he had absolute faith in at the end of a game. Myself and my friend Joe. Even though I never played at the level he did, he said there was something innate about how I approached life, and especially sports. It wasn’t about being the strongest, or fastest, or most talented… but he said when the ball was in the air, especially at the end of a game with everything on the line, he always just knew I’d go up and get it, that I would help lead the team on to victory. He said he knew I had it in me to go win this fight tonight, because no matter what, I had something inside that always rose to the occasion, even if I didn’t know what that something was. It was such an amazing thing to hear- especially in that moment. He gave me a big hug, told me he was proud of me, and that there was a huge section just waiting to cheer me on…. It was time to start getting ready.
I found a little nook and began to stretch, move around, warming up my body, connecting it to my breath. All the little things I learned came together in that moment- meditation, yoga, mindfulness, breath work, strength training… and of course, boxing. As I started to get in my zone, Ro popped in to tell me I was 4 fights away. As I jumped rope I watched videos I took in Peru of a late night fire, while Diego the Shaman sang Icaros (songs) of power and strength. My friend Bryce also recorded me a personal Icaro for the night. I was connecting with the universe, connecting with the lessons I’d learned, finding the strength that had been revealed to me, and the trust IN that strength that it would be there when I needed it.
My mind was sharpening. My body was warm. It was almost time.
When Ro came into run me through some Mit work, I was watching Braveheart on my iPad. (Braveheart was my fighting name and the music I’d walk in to!). I felt the nerves start to arrive, but it felt different. Yes there was definite anxiety, but it was a calmer version than I usually felt when getting into the ring. Even when just sparring at Mendez, I always get the shakes, I always feel super nervous, I hold my breath, I tighten up- Now I was going to be walking into a massive arena, with like 1500+ people there (I’m sure some had left already to hit the bars 😉 ), and yet I felt calm.
I knew. Win or lose it didn’t matter. I was getting in the ring. And if I just focused on that, I’d be fine. The ball was in the air, and I was going to out-jump everyone and come down with it. This was my moment.
Showtime
The officials gave a final check of my gear, and then it was time to head up. Mine was the next fight. It was almost 11pm. Initially I’d worried that my body/brain would be ready for bed (as they had been usually asleep by now these last 4 months), but I quickly realized the adrenaline running through my veins would take care of that… Yet still I was calm. My breathing was normal. My heart rate, though elevated I’m sure, wasn’t beating out of my chest like I thought it would. My inner strength and focus was ready- I repeated the Sanskrit Mantra ‘Ram’ over and over in my head as I slowly breathed in and out. It means ‘I am Strength’ and is meant to connect one to the power of the universe as well as just getting yourself in a state of ‘flow’. Fuck this was cool.
After Greg and his team went into the ring, I stood at the entrance to the arena and watched my intro video, and then it was time for that walk… My friend Jeff advised me to take it super slow, take it all in, remembering the sights and sounds as this was a once in a lifetime moment… And when I heard that Braveheart music, I got myself ready for battle. I heard my fans cheering for me. I walked up to and stepped in that ring.
The Battle of Stirling
That’s what I’m calling my match. That’s the song I walked out to. This was the pivotal battle William Wallace won against the English army back in 1297. While I was traveling, I even stood at the exact spot along the river in Stirling where the Wallace clan made their camp back then (and though it was barely sunrise- I did yell “Freedom” at the top of my lungs)!
*NOTE- I wish I could tell you more about the actual fight- but I really don’t remember a whole lot. At the point of writing this I still haven’t watched the whole thing, only the very end. But I think that’s ok, since this is the fight from the perspective of a fighter, in that moment.
Round 1
Ro and I had a game plan. Based on where I was at with my training, and what I knew about Greg from our sparring session 2 months ago, I was going to not go too hard in the first round. Just work on connecting my breath to my movements, getting my timing down for his punches, just getting comfortable- but NOT throwing anything too crazy. Tick/Tock. Block/Counter. Throw some jabs. If I saw an opening, I should take it, but really just get a feel for everything and not waste a ton of energy…
“Everyone’s got a plan until they get punched in the face’… There is no better quote for boxing than from Iron Mike Tyson himself. And nothing could have been truer in Round 1 for me.
Greg came out like a bat out of hell. He had a look in his eye that just conveyed strength. I don’t want to say I underestimated him, but his approach definitely took me completely by surprise. Some of the other fights I’d watched- as well as our own initial sparring- had both guys just kinda moving around, feeling things out, throwing jabs (and that was my plan exactly)… Greg had other ideas. He attacked me from the get go and I was fully caught off guard. Now I know Greg had power, you can see it, but he didn’t really connect on anything big a few months before… Not the case tonight. And while my training did take over and I was blocking some of his attack, he still caught me with a few shots that absolutely turned my lights off for a split second… and then I was down. In trying to get myself out of one of his attacks, my footwork got a bit backwards and I went down to a knee- and this was all within the first 30 seconds! I’m now standing in a corner while the ref gives me a standing 8 count. I’m losing this fight…
Four, Five, Six, Seven, Eight… Are you OK to continue?
As the ref is counting I had a very long conversation with myself. All the fear/self doubt/judgement demons were circling… I was getting my ass kicked in front of everyone. This was my worst nightmare come true. I felt like I’d forgotten all my training (which everyone says is the absolute norm for your first fight), and I was in a situation I could’t get out of. I couldn’t hear Ro’s coaching. I was looking around at all the people in the stands. And then my brain focused in on one thing… My friends and family chanting ‘Wallace, Wallace, Wallace…’ I didn’t need to fear their judgement, I needed to feel their love, their support, their encouragement. The notion that somehow they’d be disappointed in me, even if I lost right then and there seemed ludicrous… No. This was my strength. AND This was the way it was supposed to go. This adversity would only serve to make this experience more rewarding and much more powerful for me. If I had just come out and had it easy, I wouldn’t learn half as much… No, this was yet another one of the final challenges of this initiation. Would I rise? Or would I run? (Yes, this whole mental conversation happened in 8 seconds). And when she asked if I was OK to continue- I confidently nodded my head yes.
I came out of that 8-count with a renewed sense of confidence… (Sanskrit Mantra RAM… RAM…) I was connected. I was flowing again. I landed some shots on Greg but he definitely landed a few more. And though I knew I didn’t look like the ‘boxer’ I had become in the gym while training, I could feel muscle memory kicking in and I knew I had a strong right hand (was at the top of the list Ro had me write). I’d be ok…
In boxing, they give you an alert when there are 10 seconds left in the round (in this case banging on the table),and though I was doing better, I was thankful the round was ending… One thing though about my training and sparring, I ALWAYS finish strong. Harry coached me that even if you’ve lost the round, the judges always remember how things end so go balls out for those last few moments- and I did just that.
Sitting in the corner now, Ro asked how I was doing. I remember being calm, but not much else. I don’t really remember his coaching to be honest, except in my head it went something like this. ‘Although you finished strong, you definitely lost that round on points, so go out there attacking… no more feeling it out, it’s time to box.’ Again, Ro might have said (and likely did) something completely different, but this is what I heard…
Round 2
Greg comes out strong again, but it doesn’t catch me by surprise this time. I’m much calmer, and though he continues to land a few shots, I feel like I’m just starting to gain strength. He and I trade punches like two brawlers… There’s not a lot of defense being played. Our punches are definitely a bit wilder than we’ve learned to throw them, but we’re going at it. And then he’s down. Like me, his feet had gotten tangled up as he looked to escape my attack (rather than going down via a punch), but evening things up in the ‘knockdown’ department gave me confidence.
There was no count by the ref, she just got Greg up and ready to fight again- and fight we do. A few moments later, I catch him clean with a couple of straight rights and a hook. The ref separates us and I head to a neutral corner while the ref gives Greg his first standing 8. I don’t remember much of the actual ‘boxing’ much at all. But I remember that moment, the feeling of the Phoenix beginning to rise… I was starting to catch fire. He’s ok and we begin boxing again. I’m seeing his punches a little better. It also seems like Greg is starting to slow a bit (compared the fury he attacked with out of the gates), himself boxing a bit more composed. We square off a few times, each of us trying to get in with some jabs. And then I spot another opening and I attack… This time it’s punctuated by a pretty decent right uppercut. Greg is dazed again, and is receiving his 2nd standing 8 of the round.
Again I head to the corner. Now I hear the crowd. Wallace, Wallace, Wallace… My energy level is still on the way up. I’m relaxed (there’s even a photo where I’m leaning against the ropes with my legs crossed! (No disrespect meant, just trying to stay in my flow state).
Greg is good to go again, though I do remember seeing a bit of an unsure look on the ref’s face… I think. Or maybe I just made that up. As the ref finished counting and was about to start the fight again, the bell rang ending the round. I feel good as I head back to my corner.
Ro gives me some water and I guess is talking to me, though I have zero recollection as to what he might have said. I just know I’m looking across the ring at Greg, and he’s looking back across at me. This was it. The last round. And I’m still only gaining in strength…
Round 3
The excitement from my cheering section also seems to be building. I can feel the energy coming down from above. I’ve just now noticed the bunch of friends I have ringside as well! This place is going nuts… It’s time to box.
Again, all form is pretty much out the window at this point. I think I remember throwing like 5 jabs (when I should have thrown like 50). It was down to strength vs strength – 4 months of training all on the line right now- and neither Greg nor I was backing down.
An opening. I take it. Uppercut, Left Hook. Greg is dazed… I remember feeling like this was my moment. And even as I type this, my heart quickens, and I feel a jolt of power inside. We separate briefly, the ref gives us a quick once over and then motions for us to reengage. I remember feeling so ‘confidently relaxed’. The trust I had put into this moment had paid off. I DID have everything I needed inside to rise to this occasion. Greg and I had pushed each other to our limits. But I still felt like my strength was on the way up- and I saw another opening, I took it, put everything I had into those few last punches… and I won.
I knew as soon as he went down that the ref was going to stop the fight. And as I walked back the corner, a massive wave of relief hit… Even though I was incredibly happy I’d won, and could hear all my fans cheering for me, more than anything else I was just so relieved.
I had won by TKO. Ro was hugging me. My fans were going nuts. The ‘Wallace’ chant was so loud! I raised my fists triumphantly, paying respect to those who had supported me… The moment was starting to sink in. As the ref called us both to the center of the ring, Greg and I hugged. This guy was amazing. He’s got a demanding job as an attorney, a wife, and 3 young children- and he somehow found the time to commit 4 months of his life to this as well, also raising a ton of money. I have a lot of respect for everyone that got in the ring tonight, but especially him. He will forever be a part of my life story. As I said, it wasn’t about who had their arm raised at the end- the victory was just getting in that ring…
But- the referee did have to raise someone’s arm, and as I was announced as the ‘Winner by TKO’, the ref held my arm high. Though I don’t remember much of the match, I’ll never forget that moment. Every emotion possible all hit at the same time. I had done it. Not only had I put myself in that ring, I was leaving a champion. Greg and I shared a hug, and then it was time to put this match behind me and go celebrate with my family and friends!
Raw footage from my cheering section… Wallace chant is LOUD!
Celebration
Well- first things first. I did have a little personal celebrating to do downstairs. I had a flask of some very nice scotch awaiting! After 2.5 months AND the intensity of the day- I’ve got to say nothing has ever tasted so sweet! I shared a sip with Ro, and also with Greg who was back downstairs now as well. Waves of relief were still hitting me, and I finally was starting to feel like I could actually relax for the first time in 4 months… It was magical.
While winning was pretty epic, nothing compared to the reception I received from my cheering section. After greeting some of the gang who were ringside (these guys had me fired up during the fight!), I headed upstairs to where everyone else was. I was swarmed by hugs and high fives, everyone was so happy, the ‘Wallace’ chant was going again. I’ve never felt so loved- I definitely had some dirt in both my eyes :). There was literally like 50 people who had paid ~200/ ticket to come support me! Hey there’s Phil! He flew in to surprise me! I’m still blown away by the love and encouragement, and support (both emotionally and financially) from all my family and friends around the world. As I write this, I just checked my donation page- I didn’t even realize but a few more came in after the fight- I’ve crossed the $34K mark! So so humbled… Thank you all.
But where was Mom? She apparently had gotten a little stressed after the match and was outside smoking a cigarette- so I went out to find her. And when we saw each other, we both started crying (she a bit more than me 😉 ). I can’t remember ever seeing her as proud of me as she was that night. But this night wasn’t for me. It was for her. It was for everyone that’s stepped in the ring with cancer. And it was the absolute least I could do for this woman that gives and gives and gives so much of herself to the world, without ever asking for anything in return. And there we were, outside in the snow, hugging, crying, celebrating- it was pretty cool.
I ran back inside to grab my stuff and then it was time to head to the after party. Another fighter (my new friend Matt) was hosting at the bar he owns! As everyone was piling into Ubers to head over there, I felt like I just needed a little space. I’ve been really appreciating ‘Brian Time’ throughout this experience and I felt like I needed a quick break from the celebration to just be with myself for a sec. So while they all got in cars to head over, I took a little walk. I recorded a video message to myself with some thoughts on the moment, the raw emotions I was feeling, so that I’ll always have a little reminder of that night. I called my Dad to tell him I’d won, he was quite proud as well. And then I circled the block a few times before finally heading in.
Once again there were cheers and chants and another amazing reception. I was handed a beer and a scotch. And was FINALLY able to really just relax and enjoy the moment with my friends, family, and fellow fighters. Though I was still processing a bit so my mind wasn’t fully present, I made a conscious decision to put the processing on hold for a bit so I could enjoy this moment and celebrate with those who love me most. Pure bliss.
Keep in mind that the boxing event didn’t end until midnight so it’s now like 1 in the morning! I am NOT used to being up this late! And now, the adrenaline rush is wearing off and I can feel myself starting to crash. I know this is going to be some amazing sleep- and it’s time to say goodbye. What a night it had been.
When I got home, I poured myself a large glass of wine, then went out on my balcony and sat in my hammock, just staring at the city. The storm had passed and the night, though still chilly, was clear. I love the lights of New York City, there’s always so much energy in them, but tonight the world was silent, and still. I sat in peace and drank my wine and just looked around, externally and internally. This is another moment I’ll never forget…
Final Thoughts
I’m proud of myself. I’m not sure I realized what a commitment this would be when I agreed to participate. But it was an ass kicker. It inspired me, it exposed me, it revealed me… it showed me a path to a better version of myself. A path that would not be easy, but promised to be rewarding if I stuck with it, if I didn’t give up when it got hard (and honestly- I almost did). But I did it.
While traveling, I learned that you don’t just get to ‘get over’ your fears as they’re a part of who you are and what makes you you. But you get to choose how they affect your life, actions, thoughts, and feelings. Those fears can define you, or you can define them. By not ‘running from the shadow towards the safety of the light’ and trying to escape your fears- but rather ‘running towards the shadow with the strength of the light at your back’ you can learn to love those parts of you… Those parts you don’t like, were afraid of, or embarrassed by- ALL those parts make up the complex and wonderful person that is you. And the minute you learn to LOVE them all, love YOURSELF for who you are, ALL of who you are, YOU get to define those fears and use them as inspiration, as motivation, and navigation along the path of your life story.
This was so much more than just a boxing match for me. This was a chance to step into that cave, into the unknown and having to 100% Trust that I’d be ok. I was going to face a fear that was going to show up in many different shapes throughout the story trying to derail me, to control me, to define me- and I had to just know that when those challenges revealed themselves that I had what it took to overcome them. This was a leap of faith in myself, one that I’ve never taken before, and one that I’ll forever be glad that I did. While stepping into that ring allowed me to show everyone that I have what it takes to slay a dragon, more importantly I showed myself that I have what it takes… to finally be the Man in the Arena.
Thank you all. For everything.
Much love and bliss,
B
Photo credits:
@rachelg_photography
@thatbleachedblonde
@Dillon.Harding
@ghogue02
@KailaneAndrade
@KevinJude
@valeryshpakphotography
@gauntletfilms
KO'ing Cancer 